As I sat alone gently deconstructing this beautiful flower, I was struck by how exquisite the smell of a freshly picked magnolia blossom is.
pale velvet petals
the scent, intoxicating
brief moments in time
Impermanence
“I love nature partly because she is not man, but a retreat from him. None of his institutions control or pervade her. There a different kind of right prevails. In her midst, I can be glad with an entire gladness. If this world was all man I could not stretch myself— I should lose all hope. He is constraint; she is freedom to me. He makes me wish for another world— she makes me content with this.”
- Henry David Thoreau
I’ve always been drawn to dilapidated structures. I think I used to fear that it was some weird thing, to be drawn to the decay. But I’ve come to realize that it isn’t the decay of the structure I’m drawn to, but rather the way that nature often shows her power in those spaces. As a friend once said to me. “I find nature reclaiming our constructions to be comforting and often, beautiful.” When the world is at its darkest I take solace in her gentle reminder of our impermanence.
Broken
It’s the word that’s been running through my head for days, and the word I feel down to the very depth of my core when I consider the events of the last week. This sucks. It hurts. It’s impossible to watch without feeling the vomit rise up in my throat. I feel helpless, not because I think I can’t do something, but becuase I don’t know where to start and I question whether it can even make a difference. I feel despair. I feel rage. I feel anguish at what others are going through. But you know what? How I feel doesn’t matter. And it shouldn’t matter. Because what I feel is only a tiny fraction of what people within the black community are feeling.
Anyone who knows me, or as followed me on other platforms for any real amount of time knows that I don’t do this. I largely ignore politics and current events because for the most part, in the scheme of things, they don’t matter. They’re insignificant. But this. This is not insignificant.
For those who are hurting please know I hurt with you, little as that may mean. I may never understand, but I will never stop trying. For those who want to do something, there are plenty of organizations that could use a donation and your support. Do the research and find the one that you most want to get behind. And for God’s sake, use every - and I mean every - opportunity given you to vote the change you want to see.